ASC Pt. III

"I saw her today... I saw her face... It was a face I loved... and I knew... I had runaway..."

Yea... so I saw her today. It was kind of odd and sad because it was just a moment in passing as she was hurrying off to class, but she acknowledge my existence and said "Hello."

Yea, I'm so Nitz and she's so Kimmy Burton... Undergrads fans will understand the reference... please, let there be some Undergrads fans still out there.

Maybe it was a bad choice to do it today... I dunno... maybe it was, maybe it wasn't... let's see how the year goes along.

God, is it wrong to be 24 and still get schoolboy crushes? Why can't I just meet a girl (that's single of course) like her, say, "Hey, you wanna do something sometime?" and, ya know, do something sometime? Why is it all so confusing? Why do I not get along with 99% of humanity? Why can't I be happy with a pair of Nikes and a Big Mac? I can't be part of the normal people... the normies of the world. I can't, but I want to.

But importantly, why can't I find someone remotely somewhat like me? And why are the ones even somewhat like me, I find them too late and they're married or engaged or promise ringed or just not interested or live across the continent.

Perhaps I'm not just lovable or good enough or smart enough or cute enough or maybe I'm just meant to live a life of dreaming of what it might be like to be in love.

I miss Her... whoever she might be.